Status Update

I just wanted to give a quick status update.  I wish I had something more positive to say but the harsh reality is that Maggie is doing poorly.  Of most significance, she is having tremendous difficulty breathing.  Any physical movement throws off her ability to catch her breath, despite the constant stream of supplied oxygen.  Leaving the bed is a down right struggle.  And smiles are pretty rare and are never spontaneous.  But when I ask, she always obliges.

Her poor body is being beat to hell with tumors.  Her abdomen is distended and sore.  Her neck has visible blobs swelling around the base that bulge with each cough.  She continues to cough up stuff from her lungs, which makes her happy*, although it’s a real physical effort.  And her lower back is badly bothering her.  She thinks it’s her kidneys but who knows.

* Coughing stuff up means getting that which is bad out.  Coughing sucks but out is good.

A few people have invited us out or encouraged us to do things that involve leaving the house.  Thank you for your invitations but that’s definitely not something that’s going to happen any time soon.  Right now, just leaving the bed is a traumatic event.  Upstairs to the TV room to watch our favorite shows is probably an impossibility.  Out of the house, no way.

A number of Maggie’s friends have come to visit over the last few days, which I know she’s enjoyed.  Sadly, her interaction is limited to an occasional smile or short sentence.  She’s very much in a listen-only mode.

I wish I had more encouraging things to write.  Watching this happen is without question the most difficult thing I’ve ever witnessed.  No doubt, it’s the most difficult thing Maggie’s ever had to do, too.  I only wish I could do more to help her.

21 thoughts on “Status Update

  1. Chris,

    You don’t know me but I just had to write a note after reading your latest post. I am so sorry things are so hard right now for you and of course especially for all Maggie is going through. I came across your blog just recently, from Karen and Fran’s blog, which I came across after a friend had been diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer. I lost a brother to cancer at the age of sixteen so I know maybe a little of what you are going through. I just want to say that you are both in my prayers right now. You and Maggie’s story has touched my heart – I don’t even have the words. Thank you for your blog and sharing your life and love with all of us.

    God’s peace and comfort to you both – Nancy

  2. Maggie and Chris,
    I start each day with prayers for you, precious Maggie. I will continue to pray for both of you. (I Thessalonians 5:17 Pray without ceasing)Chris, you are doing all that God would have you do. As I pray for Maggie’s healing, I will also pray that our Heavenly Father will lift you up and keep you strong. We all have our arms around you both, and so does He. Love, Katie’s Mom

  3. Chris & Maggie, this scripture came to mind tonight while I was reading your latest entry. I pray for your faith and trust to increase exceedingly. Maggie keep on believing in miracles. God is still in control. He has a purpose in all of this even though our frail, human minds can’t comprehend it all.

    You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Isaiah 26:3

  4. Chris- just replied to Maggie’s post and then read this update… hard to find words… sending thoughts of peace and healing and comfort to both you and Maggie tonight.

  5. I heard about your site through a friend of a friend. I just wanted to leave you a quick note to tell you how inspired I am by your courage. You all are in my prayers!

  6. Chris,

    Hold Maggie’s hand my friend, offer a soft comforting smile and commiserate together. You’ve done Maggie the most important of honors. You’ve validated love, what more significant thing could be left to do?

    Don MacLeod

  7. Maggie, I know your breathing is difficult right now, but with every breath you take, picture that you also rid your body from the tumors when you exhale. Inhale healing, positive energy, and all the love and prayers from all of us who have you in our thoughts constantly. Chris may God continue to give you strength and serenity. You’re an exceptional husband, and may you be rewarded with a miracle. May God’s peace, comfort, and healing be with the two of you.

  8. Just wanted to let you know you both are in my thoughts and prayers. Chris you are a wonderful person and I know you have and will continue to do all you can. Love is wonderful. Maggie know that you are loved very much by many. May God Bless you both.

  9. Dear Chris, my heart broke when I read this I can feel your pain with each word, and I am numb right now and can not think o f anything to say.

    My heart hurts for what Maggie and you are going through, and I just hope and pray to God to help you both right now.

    God bless you both…as Tony said it, you are Maggie’s angel.

    Much love,

    We are all praying for both of you.

  10. Chris,
    I am so, so, sorry. I feel profound empathy for both of you. As horrible as this is for the patient, it is equally, if not more difficult, for the caregiver to witness. I don’t know if you still have hospice care, but if you do, I hope that they will give Maggie whatever meds she needs to help her with her pain and fear. Avail yourself of anything that can help you as well. You too, must be exhausted. Know that you are both in my thoughts. Thank you for your update.

  11. Still praying for a miracle and speaking positive affirmations for you both! I really hope you find some moments of peace amidst this all.

  12. Chris,

    You do not know me either. I have been following your blog for sometime and I admire the courage that Maggie and you have put forth. The both of you are a true testament to life itself. Having witnessed my father battle his cancer and now reading about your fight, if faced with a similar situation to yours, I hope I too will have the same strength and courage that you and Maggie have displayed. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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