Today is the tenth anniversary of our first date. Suffice to say the day started out pretty rough. But, hey, it got worse from there. Fortunately, and unbeknownst to them, some friends rescued me from my pity party with a random and well-timed invitation to lunch and a movie. We saw Night in a Museum II which was cute and a welcome distraction followed immediately byafternoon drinks and chit-chat at Baby A’s on the patio. It was nice.
A few days ago, I made a decision. To many of you, it’s an obvious decision and no doubt you’ll chide me with a loud “duh!” Simma down na. It’s a little more difficult than just pressing the Easy button. But I can hear Maggie’s voice in my head, “Just try and see what happens.” So that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to try to turn this blog into a book.
My plan is complex, multi-layered and thoroughly thought out: I’ll point my shoes in that general direction and see if doors open in my path. If they do, then we are on. If I feel like I’m swimming up hill, then I’ll stop. Frankly, I don’t know what to expect and I’m a little apprehensive about taking this step. But in the whole What Would Maggie Do? world I live in now, the answer is clear: write a book.
It’s obvious that I have some pieces already in place. I’ve certainly got a lot of raw material here. Additionally, you have proven to me that it’s readable. What I definitely believe is that a book chronicling our journey can help people if, in no other way, just to give that glimmer of light I’ve mentioned.
See, I tend to be very practical. She was the dreamy, let’s-count-animals-in-the-clouds one in our relationship. Me, I need to see how the hammer hits the nail and how the nail is going to fix something. So it’s hard for me to see clearly how this blog has helped anyone. I’m not asking for affirmations here. I’m just explaining my warped sense of what is. (My mom told me one evening over supper that I was not qualified to judge my own writing, something I still struggle with understanding.)
I think back on Lance Armstrong’s book “It’s Not About the Bike” that I read back when we were in Waco. Back then I was helping Maggie finish out the last days of law school by acting as her pack mule, cook, bodily-fluid cleanup guy, medicine scheduler, driver, and anything else that came up other than attending class and studying. Every other evening or so, while she studied (or slept) was usually spent taking Chris time at the restaurant next door called Buzzard Billy’s. There, I’d eat, drink a beer and read. There were many, many nights were I sat bellied up to the bar trying like mad not to burst into obvious tears reading that book. It was the hardest book I’ve ever made it through. But, even though the book didn’t offer any fix-it tips or methods of coping or ways to deal with nausea, it helped me deal. Why? I’m not sure. But it did. Definitely. Maybe it was just perspective.
In that same way, maybe the book this blog builds would give the same thing to someone – perspective. I’m guessing, really. I have no clue. It’s extremely difficult for me to understand these complexities. I’m an geek/engineer by training. I get gears, motors, electricity and how those things can move mountains. These mysterious inner workings of emotion are out, way out of my realm of comfort and understanding. But I know that after reading Lance’s book I felt a little bit better.
Thus, the book is on. Well, more specifically, I’m going to head in that direction for a bit to see what happens.
Again, I’m not looking for affirmations. But if you have an idea of how this book would look I’m all ears… uhm… eyes.